Psalm 34:1-8 ESV - I will bless the Lord at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul makes its boast in the Lord; Let the humble hear and be glad. Oh, magnify the Lord with me, And let us exalt his name together! I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. This poor man cried, and the Lord heard him and saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and delivers them. Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!
To those who don’t know me, I’m Esther, married to Nick. We have 3 lovely children and have been members of Gateway for 12 years. I want to share some of what I have been through over the last year.
Back in August 2022, I began to feel very anxious. I couldn’t explain exactly why, but life just seemed to overwhelm me. This developed into depression in the months that followed to the point that on 8th November I took an overdose of sleeping tablets and ended up in A&E.
Eventually, antidepressants seemed to kick in and I began to feel better at the beginning of this
year, but still felt far from God, unsure about my faith and not engaged with church. But God is faithful. Throughout that awful time, he put amazing people around me. My husband Nick did school runs, made packed lunches, cooked dinners and did the weekly grocery order on top of working full time.
Family and friends offered practical help, organised a meal rota and checked in on me frequently and so many others from both inside and outside of church were there for us, including my colleagues from work.
Thank God that I’m now in a good place mentally. I’m still taking antidepressants and don’t plan to stop them any time soon. I did a course of CBT which I found helpful. But the glory belongs to God, who never gives up on us, who never forsakes us and whose love never fails.
Psalm 40:1-5 ESV - I waited patiently for the Lord; He inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their trust in the Lord. I have told the glad news of deliverance in the great congregation; behold, I have not restrained my lips, as you know, O Lord. I have not hidden your deliverance within my heart; I have spoken of your faithfulness and your salvation; I have not concealed your steadfast love and your faithfulness from the great congregation.
Are you feeling overwhelmed? Hopeless? Then please do get in touch, you are not alone (details below). If you are in immediate crisis and someone to talk to straight away please contact the Samaritans 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. You can call 116 123 (free from any phone), email jo@samaritans.org or visit some branches in person. You can also call the Samaritans Welsh Language Line on 0808 164 0123 (7pm–11pm every day).
For a longer list of places that provide support please click here.
Gateway Church Ashford | The Riverside Centre, Clockhouse, Ashford, Kent, TN23 4YN | 01233 638866 | office@gatewaychurchashford.co.uk